The TF preference

(File Last Modified Fri, Oct 25, 2002.)

• The third type dimension: (T)Thinking / (F)Feeling
• Two ways of judging
• Example 1: different rational criteria
• Example 2: Please understand me
• Example 3: The person or the company
• the TF preference summary

The third type dimension: (T)Thinking / (F)Feeling

Two ways of judging

Thinking and feeling are two different ways of making decisions. Thinking refers to making decisions impersonally, and Feeling refers to making decisions based on personal values.

When we use Thinking, we organize our behaviors in terms of general, impersonal predictability: rules, laws, principles, logical or numerical sequence, definition, hierarchy and so on. Thinkers pride themselves on their ability to be objective and analytical. They make decisions by analyzing and weighing the evidence, even if that means coming to unpleasant conclusions.

When we use Feeling, we organize our behaviors in terms of specific, personal criteria: the signs and rituals that convey our shared beliefs, values, moral sensibilities, identification with others, and social relationship. Feelers make decision based on how much they care or what they feel is right. They pride themselves on their ability to be empathetic and compassionate.

Everyone uses both preferences. Thinkers do have emotions and personal values, and Feelers can be perfectly logical. However, everyone has a natural preference regardless how he/she was raised or encouraged to be.

Example 1: different rational criteria

Thinking is usually considered a rational way of making decisions, while a Feeling approach is considered irrational. This is not the case. They are both rational methods; they just use different criteria.

Robert, a Feeler, is responsible for conducting disciplinary hearings for students accused of violating the college's rules. He also decides the appropriate punishments as needed. A student, Henry, was caught smoking marijuana in his dormitory, a violation that usually carries a penalty of suspension for one semester, followed by two semesters of probation. Looking into the case, Robert discovered that Henry, a freshman, had been assigned to a room with two senior students who had both been in and out of trouble. Robert also learned that Henry had an excellent academic record, and he had never been in any trouble before. Henry appeared to be genuinely contrite, and he was terrified about how his parents might react if he were suspended, since they had made real sacrifices to send him to school. Taking all these things into consideration, Robert fixed Henry's punishment at mandatory attendance in a six-week campus drug awareness program, followed by one semester of probation.

The dean, a Thinker, thought this punishment was too lenient and made no sense. She thought that failing to hold all students to the same standard set a dangerous precedent, and she asked Robert to justify his decision.

As Robert put it, ``I know I could have suspended Henry. But I looked at the situation this way: we never should have assigned him the roommates we did, especially knowing how eager freshmen are to be accepted. As far as I'm concerned, we created the problem. Henry is a good kid, a good student, and an asset to the school. And after all, we are first an educational institution. I feel Henry has learned a valuable lesson from this experience, and I see no need to punish him for a relatively minor offense in a way which could affect his whole life.''

Although Robert's decision was based on his own personal values and interpretation of the situation, he certainly did not make his decision irrationally.

Example 2: Please understand me

Thinkers can be analytical to the point of seeming cold, and Feelers can be personally involved to the point of seeming overemotional. When they clash, more often than not the Feeler ends up hurt and angry, while the Thinker is confused about what went wrong.

Tony, a Feeler, is a salesman for a large office-furniture manufacturer. He booked a morning flight to Chicago to attend a lunch meeting with some representatives from a company that was refurbishing its offices. Tony's boss had flown in the night before in order to dine and wine these important prospective clients.

When Tony arrived one and one half hours later to the meeting, his boss was clearly irritated. Tony explained that one of the engines on his first flight had burst into flames, necessitating an emergency landing in Detroit. After he'd waited for two hours, the airline finally found Tony a seat in the first class section of another flight so he could complete his trip.

When his boss's first question was how much the extra first class accommodation had cost the firm, Tony stared at his boss with astonishment, hurt at his apparent lack of appreciation for what Tony had just been through.

Tony's boss was baffled and said, ``I don't understand why you're upset with me. It's not that I don't care about your safety. But it's obvious that you're all right so now I'm simply curious about the added cost.''

Example 3: The person or the company

Due to a restructuring of his company, Tom, a Feeler is being forced to lay off one employee from the marketing department. The choice has come down to Ted, a 57-year-old with 22 years at the company; or Alan, 36-year-old who joined the firm 2 years ago. Both men have similar job descriptions and satisfactory performance.

At a meeting with his boss, Tome explained why he would like to keep Ted and let Alan go. ``Ted has been a loyal employee, and I appreciate the fact that he is always willing to go the extra mile to get a job done right and to help others succeed. As far as his personal situation is concerned, Ted has one son in college and another starting next fall. His wife is in poor health. I'm concerned that a man his age who has worked exclusively for one company this long would have a hard time finding a comparable job. Alan is young, ambitious, and mobile; he'll have no trouble finding a good job. Besides, I feel that by rewarding loyalty and hard work, we make all of our employees feel better about working here.''

His boss, a Thinker, sees the situation differently. ``No one is saying that Ted isn't a great guy and a good employee. Personally, I've always liked him. But this decision has to be based on what's best for the company, not what's best for the individual. Ted's best years are behind him, and it's unlikely that he will ever move up. Alan's best years are ahead of him. He is senior management material; with proper grooming, he could become a very important asset to the company. Also, because of his seniority, we pay Ted twenty thousand dollars more than we pay Alan, and there is a greater likelihood of significant health care costs down the road for Ted than there is for Alan. It's an unfortunate situation, but it just doesn't make sense to keep Ted and let Alan go.''

If you are in the position to be responsible for the company, you are likely to keep Alan eventually. However, the difference is: while a Thinker makes this decision with no difficulty, a Feeler usually finds it's tough and has to struggle to make it.

the TF preference summary

Thinking types:

    * Step back; apply impersonal analysis to problems
    * Value logic, justice, and fairness; 
      one standard for all
    * Naturally see flaws and tend to be critical
    * Consider it more important to be 
      truthful than tactful
    * Believe feelings are valid only if they are logical
    * Are motivated by desire for achievement 
      and accomplishment

Feeling types:

    * Step forward; consider effect of actions on others
    * Value empathy and harmony; 
      see the exception to the rule
    * Naturally like to please others; 
      show appreciation easily
    * Consider it important to be tactful 
      as well as truthful
    * Believe any feeling is valid whether 
      it makes sense or not
    * Are motivated by desire to be appreciated